Intersection of Pranks 6

An hour later

Yuuta: Hey, sorry for being late.

Rinne: Ohh, so you’re finally here. You really dragged your ass getting Ninja-kun back to his dorm.

I was about ready to hit up the pachinko to kill some time ‘cause you took so damn long.

Yuuta: I ended up buying a bunch of snacks for Shinobu-kun as an apology, but I lost track of time!

Seriously, why did we need to change locations to talk about this?

And why are Kiryuu-senpai and Narukami-senpai still here?

Kuro: Amagi-senpai dragged us along. Said we knew too much, so we had to go along with it.

Arashi: Not like we asked to hear it or anything...

Yuuta: ...Rinne-senpai, what’s the point of forcing more people into this?

Rinne: A prank’s done for if it gets found out. They overheard us talking, so I had no choice but to get them under my thumb.

‘Sides, I’ll bet you two aren’t so happy about the VP using you like tools during Yuta’s prank.

Kuro: I mean, sure. We got pulled into some scheme without even knowing. Ain’t exactly the best thing in the world.

Arashi: And we ended up hurting Yuuta-chan—well, Shinobu-chan by accident, huh?

Yuuta: I’m really sorry about that.

Arashi: You don’t need to apologize to us. Save it for Shinobu-chan, okay? ♪

Kuro: Guess it’s final then: we’re helpin’ out with the prank. What exactly are you havin’ us do though, Amagi-senpai?

Rinne: Eh, nothing major. Don’t worry about it.

I want you guys to keep an eye on the VP while we lay the groundwork for things.

Arashi: Sure, I don’t mind. But Ibara-chan’s a CosPro idol, right?

Wouldn’t it make more sense for you or Yuuta-chan to do that?

Rinne: Sure, it’d prolly be easier for us, but that’s only within the ES building.

Yuuta: I’m not following. What exactly are you planning here?

Rinne: All right, listen and be amazed! The prank we’re gonna pull on the VP is—

The classic of all classics. We’re gonna give him a wake-up call!

Yuuta: Surprisingly straightforward and standard-fare.

Kuro: Huh, I thought Amagi-senpai would try something wilder than that.

Arashi: I was thinking he’d smash the windows of his dorm or something.

Rinne: What kinda guy do you even think I am?

I thought North-san would be the only kind of person who’d come up with an idea like that.^[1]

Why does everyone wanna smash windows all of a sudden, huh? You guys stressed out or something?

Anyway, if we’re pranking the VP, this is the perfect scale for it.

Yuuta: Why’s that? I’d think it’d be less likely for him to catch on if we made it look like a gig.

Rinne: And who was it that got caught right after doing that, huhhh?

Yuuta: Urgh...

Rinne: Vice President Four-Eyes is in the position where he’s gonna look over all the work that comes through the agency.

‘Course, that means he’ll look at fake proposals you wanna use to prank him, too. If that happens, it’s almost certain he’ll figure it out.

Even if we got the fake proposal approved, the next step we’d have to take is lure him into the trap.

So we’d have to come up with something that makes a vigilant guy like the VP find some merit in working.

We’d already be playing on hard mode tryna sneak a fake proposal in there, but on top of that we’d have to make it something the VP himself would wanna jump at.

Which is basically impossible from where we stand. It’ll just end up smelling fishy.

Kuro: I get it. So it wasn’t just some half-assed plan to do a wake-up prank.

Rinne: This is the VP we’re dealing with. Even this meeting could get leaked if we don’t choose our meeting places wisely.

Arashi: So is that why we changed locations?

Rinne: The VP has jurisdiction over the information bureau, so he could watch the surveillance footage on any camera he wants.

If you try any funny business at ES, just don’t be surprised if he’s got the whole place tapped.

So basically the ES building is the VP’s turf. Tryna fight on his home base is a piss-poor idea.

Yuuta: ...So you decided to give him a rude awakening.

Rinne: Yep. Finally back on track, Yuta?

If we’re pulling a prank on him, we need a place where his guard is down and surveillance isn’t as tight.

That leaves us with Starmony Hall. His men can’t get in there.

On top of that, no one in his dorm is part of CosPro.

We shouldn’t have any problems if we just get all their stories straight about work and whatnot. So I’m asking Dora-chan and Narushi here for some help getting those stories together.

Kuro: I get it now. Yeah, we could prolly manage something like that.

Rinne: Right? So now it’s just a matter of how we’re gonna greet the VP when he wakes up in the morning.

How ‘bout this one? We could throw a cream pie in his face to say good morning?

That’d be the best alarm clock ever, gyahaha ♪

Arashi: No way! That’d be a total waste of good food!

Kuro: I’m nixing it, too. It’d fuck up the sheets, dude. Think about the guy who’s gotta wash ‘em.

Rinne: Is that really what you’re worried about? Damn goody-two-shoes...

Yuuta: ......

Rinne: Mm? What’s up, Yuta? You’re not seriously thinking of jumping ship now, are you?

Yuuta: No way. Once the ship sails, I’m on board until I know it’s sinking.

Rinne: So you’d jump ship if it springs a leak?

Yuuta: I don’t want to share my fate with you.

Rinne: We’ve been sharing our fates since the second we boarded the same ship! You already bet all your money on me.

So if we’re gonna die, let’s sink into the waters together, gyahaha ♪

Yuuta: Well, we should just try not to sink in the first place, right? Sigh... so if pie’s a no-go, how about a water balloon?

Rinne: Ooh, not bad! I’ll take you up on that!

Yuuta: ......

(...If we go with Rinne-senpai’s plan, we might actually be able to outplay the VP.)

(But is that actually okay? Doesn’t this mean I’m just going along with his plan?)

(What do I really want to do...? What’s my actual purpose here...?)